All of Nothing

I walk down the street to feel tears in my eyes I walk up again to feel they hide inside I go on my way to see things going worse But my faults I still don’t realize. Each day passes as another mistake Effortless I remain with excuses so fake I hate the purposelessness to its extreme And still don’t realize what is at stake.. A change is needed Or the need is changed Attached to both ,disturbances remain. Whatever view of time I take It hits me the same again and again. Nothing can I hold firm Sensing the loss,I grow numb I pull and push myself And stand yet again lost at the next turn. I slip away from me,not from life Struggle to live,crave to die. I dwell under something I haven’t defined And survive with unrealized mistakes in my mind. The cover of life conceals my scars It inhibits me and demands my powers. I wrap the cover tightly around, Not wanting to surrender, I indulge in a war. I lose far more than a lost fight And need to keep the wraps tight. At every...

in the noise of the day in the stillness of night in the echo of my laugh and in the tear of my eye, in the despair of losing and in the smile of achieving in the pieces of my shattered existence and in every moment i repent, in the fear of living and in the wait of death, in my soul, in each breath, inside my heart, inside my mind, in all i do, in all i hide inside me all the time i feel the same again and again u try to avoid the blues BUT I STILL MISS U!!!

something holds me back when i seek my death but i want to leave and never come back.. i hold nothing for this world, nor this world has anything for me i don't want to live with myself anymore; nor with anybody. may be i am hurt deeply and i keep on hurting others but i can no more stand this confusion 'cos i have grown a stranger here. misery surrounds me from every direction and pain comes running to me sorrow manifests itself as tears this life i'm unable to bear; i feel. i want to jump this life to its end i want to go to my GOD and stay there i asked my lord to call me to Him but i'm not lucky to get my death,i think... what holds me back is not anything worldly nobody and nothing calls me back, but my God doesn't allow me to end my life, when He sends death..then only i can die. grant my wish , i plead my survival is the biggest disturbance for me pain has buried itself inside myself and i've become a problem for everything as everything ha...

Captured by insecurities Uncertainty gives me a refuge Gloom is held tight inside When miseries turn so huge Melancholy is so deep absorbed That it need not make its presence felt With all those horrors of sadness Words begin to melt. A second later and a second later Have thousands of years in between Widespread confusions sway in the air Whatever shall they mean.. In this battlefield everything is at war Though none has strength ,none has power No purpose of what is done is seen or known But finally everythingfalls down; coloured with gore. Those who are dead fall to the ground But the misfortunate alive is again dragged to life. Those who never entered this battlefield ; Are still at peace….. As I can see,living through it all Can turn out to be a pity..

Far across the sea, the sun is setting down beyond the horizons, it buries its radiance - throughout the night which can never be found. Behind he hills,the sun has gone And a deep dark silence is borne With the fall of darkness ; the hills Appear to be huge black stones. The deep woods turn black; The swinging trees seem to be lifeless pillars And gradually I realize that in the woods I am trapped; and I turn around to witness darkness everywhere. Until the sun had set, The woods were lively and fresh The depth of woods was then a beauty And now their depth adds to my misery. My breath has been trapped by the stillness of the woods, Not even a leaf dares to move But darkness moves into every corner And the night itself has become a funeral. When the sun shone the sand glittered and on the leaves, those dew drops shimmered. That shine was lost and taken away, And now darkness blocks my way. The trees, the hills and the sea Offer uninterrupted silence and unknown fear And this deep dark...

Happy days are gone That smile doesn't return Tears are what I have What is there yet to come? To kill someone is murder; to kill oneself is suicide Out of this fury when will you come Where will you ultimately reside? Past has gone, future is dark There is no end,there is no start. Miseries gaze; I shut my eyes What is difficult - to live or to die? Darkness prevails adding to my misery Someone may be near; but I cant see. I walk and stumble; fall on my way And I could reach out to nothing but agony. Faces are turned, promises undone, Memories remain, rest is shunned. What was the truth; what is the lie? What was there , is not today in sight. Time ticks away; people pass by Life has become stagnant, I am left behind. No cure, no remedy exists for this state of mind As pain heightens, hopes try to commit suicide. Joy shed tears, miseries laugh Dreams betray, adversities last. Was that right? Is this wrong? No sense of judgment I've anymore. What went wrong no way I can find, C...

Time slips from my hands I make castle out of sand A powerful wind sweeps it away And all my efforts are in vain. Sadness is in the air Everything seems hard to bear Wherever I go shadows follow me In this darkness nothing I can see. Dreams are broken Hopes are shattered Gone are those days When one could reckon. Painful heart, tearful eyes Are not the things that you need to survive. As efforts lose their way I think problems are here to stay. That cheer on face, that twinkle in the eyes And that frequent smile - all faded away And today as I see myself, I’ve nothing but dismay. The setting sun is not followed by a moonlit night Even the stars are nowdays not that bright. These clouds make this night dreadful and dark After every few steps , I’ve to make a new start. At the end of this journey where do I reach? Was this that I dreamed to achieve? My belief is shaken, And the faith weakens, In this sad heart of mine A piercing pain deepens. Unanswered questions, probing thoughts In wha...